AFC South - Hazzardous Understudies?

Catherine Bach is a close, personal friend of mine. We spent many long, passionate nights in each others’

Ahh...Catherine - I'll always remember your haystacks

embrace while she was at the height of her popularity as Daisy Duke in the seminal series, The Dukes of Hazzard. Now, Jessica Simpson and I have allegedly shared many a sessions of sweet also, but as Daisy Duke, nothing beats the incomprable Ms. Bach. Some of my newer readers may view this paragraph as non-sensical bragging, with no connection to football. Of course, my loyal readers all know better.

You see, in 1982, Tom Wopat and John Schneider walked off the set in a labor dispute. The producers went forward with the series any replacing the second and third most important characters (my own Daisy was number one) with a couple of no-name scrubs. Of course, the show floundered badly, and soon Wopat and Schneider were back – but the show was much worse for wear. Oh, how Catherine cried against my flux capacitor after our strenuous sessions of sweet; she was worried for the series and her livelihood – it was a tough time.

Indianapolis Colts, meet the Dukes of Hazzard.

Indianapolis Colts -11-5 – Division Winner

Peyton Manning is said to be healthy, I’ll believe it when I see it, but he’s not very mobile anyway. I think he’ll be alright, but Colts fans are on pins and needles awaiting a view at Manning in action, and they should be. It may be a slow start for Manning, but by week 3, he should be OK. If Manning is really hurt, forget about it, the Jaguars win this division going away. Manning, however, is not the reason for my Daisy Duke analogy – Jeff Saturday is. Saturday will be out for a considerable amount of time, well into the regular season. Saturday is the guy who has to make line calls in time with Peyton Manning’s wild gestures. I swear, Manning looks like a Jerome Robbins dancer who needs to go pee-pee really bad, it’s bleeping annoying. Anyhoo – Saturday was very good at this and kept Manning upright, not an easy task. Steve Justice is most likely to have this task now, and it really worries me that the kid (he’s 24 years old) won’t be up to the task. We’ll know very quickly if Justice is up to the task, of course the Colts will need to simplify their offense, but that isn’t a big deal, I think, they have a ton of offensive talent at skill positions.

Defensively, not much has changed, which is a good thing. Bob Sanders needs to stay healthy, but expect a defense that will be hard hitting, and quick. If the offense is better than half speed, the opposing offenses will be one dimensional and make it easy

Jacksonville Jaguars – 11-5 – Wildcard Winner

I love David Garrard, he’s a very good pro QB. Now, you fantasy fans don’t love him as much as I do, that’s understandable. Garrard only ever has one flashy stat, his INT numbers (18 TDs to 3 INTs…THREE!!). Garrard takes care of the ball, and that, coupled with the Jags’ running game (Maurice Jones-Drew and Fred Taylor) make the Jags a dangerous team. The Jags have a couple new WRs in the fold, Jerry Porter and Troy Williamson, they should be a slight upgrade (hold onto the ball, Troy), but they don’t matter too much, this is a ball control team.

The Jags added Derrick Harvey to add to an already dangerous pass rush, they learned from the Eagles/Giants formula against the Pats, and could cause…BZT… some real problems for the Colts, especially if Saturday is out for both games against the Jags. The Jaguars are a steady, well coached team by Jack Del Rio, who I like to call Jack of the River (put the ax away Jack). The Jags are going to cause opposing teams fits, and I can easily see the Jags running away with the division if the Colts have a real problem at center.

Tennessee Titans – 8-8

Vince Young better step up. Frankly, I am putting some unfounded faith in Young, and this is a situation where I am trusting Jeff Fisher to get this guy interested in playing professional football. You would think that huge paycheck would be enough motivation, but apparently not enough for Vincent. I expect the Titans to pull a page from the Jags playbook and keep the ball on the ground. Like Jeff Saturday (I really can’t overemphasize his loss) Young’s dedication level is THE key storyline for the Titans. One thing I like for Young’s chances , and why I have them at 8-8 , is the fact that Mike Heimerdinger is back to bring Young along like he did for Steve McNair. I like their rushing game with Lendale White and the rookie Chris Johnson. Johnson could be the best of the bunch in a rookie RB crop full of talent and opportunity. Look for Alge Crumpler to be the #1 option for the Titans for most passing plays.

Jevon Kearse is also back…big whoop. Seriously, Jevon will be a capable situational #4 DE for the Titans, but this is a solid unit who were in the top 10 in sacks and yards allowed. Albert Haynesworth is a manimal who will command a lot of attention and let the linebackers concentrate on getting to the ball carrier without having to fight off linemen.

Houston Texans – 8-8

The Texans are on the right course, but have a major question, who is the QB who will win them the most games this year? All evidence so far points to Sage Rosenfels, but Texans management is betting on the younger Matt Schaub. Schaub will start the season, but should not be considered Teflon. If he falters, I would put in Rosenfels, my prediction heuristics can’t quite predict what coach Gary Kubiak will do if Schaub falters due to performance, not injury. Kubiak is the guy most responsible for the Denver Broncos rushing success, helping perfect the Zone Blocking scheme. I like the Texans running back stable, and I expect rookie Steve Slaton to separate himself from Ahman Green, Chris Taylor and Chris Brown, but Green looks to be the guy at the beginning of the season. The Texans also have a sweet receiving corps led by Andre Johnson. Kevin Walter and TE Owen Daniels give the QB plenty of options.

If Houston is going to make the playoffs they need to get better at stopping their opponents. The Texans allowed 344 yards per game, which put them at #24 in the league. Mario Williams has turned out to be a worthy selection over Reggie Bush, but the Texans need to stop the run much better with DTs Travis Johnson and Anthony Weaver. The Texans were better against the run than the pass (#19 against the rush) in 2007, but I think excelling against the run will be key for the Texans, force their opponents to pass, let Mario and Amobi Okoye go after the QB and create some chaos.